November 17, 2005
What Really Is Meant...
Demistfying Divas and the Gentlemen's Club ask: "What do women/men say and what do they really mean, and why do men grunt instead of speaking?" Interesting, indeed.
I'll be honest and tell you, I just can't figure out what women mean when they speak. Theirs is a very complex language, full of double and triple meanings... and sometimes (I feel) no meaning. Heheh...
There are nuances in everything said, and this is where many will tell you that communication problems start. You really need to pay attention to a woman when she's speaking, and some feel that guys just aren't willing to do that. I'll tell you... most of us do. It's a matter of interpetation, both of how words are enunciated or screamed at you, and their facial expressions as they are talking to you. For instance:
"I'm fine..." usually means "I'm pissed," although it really can mean that she's fine.
"Sure, go right ahead..." means "If you want to piss me off, you just go ahead and do your selfish act." When used like this, it will be along the lines of "Sure, go ahead... I'll be fine." However, it can also actually mean that she's cool with your plans to go hunting or whatever it is you want to do.
"Be honest with me..." This one depends. It's best to be honest in any dealings, and if she asks you for an honest opinion about something other than herself, she means it. HOWEVER, this is the grass mat covering the punji pit if she follows it up by asking about something personal. Don't lie... don't answer. Run the hell away... no matter how you answer, you've already fallen into the trap. You're stuck my friend.
And, through personal experience, "When we're married" does not guarantee a "Yes" response to a proposal. Heheh... it's funny now. Actually it's very funny now... it just wasn't then.
And guys aren't totally free of meaning something other than what's said. Oh sure, for the most part, you can trust us. Trust me. But everynow and then, we'll manipulate a conversation. How? I can't tell you that... it's a trade secret! Ladies, just watch for vague questions, or answers. And grunts don't count as vague answers.
I've thought about the grunting thing, and didn't really know how to explain it. Until watching my 11/2 year old nephew the other day. Then it all clicked... grunting is a sign of being comfortable with someone.
Layne was talking, saying a few words like dog, cat, mom, dad, and some others. But now, as he's gotten older, he's turned caveman. Mostly grunts and leading folks about by the finger. My cousin's kid did the same thing, only that kid was just a talking machine. He was carrying on conversations at just over a year old, and then, one day, he reverted to grunts. The thing is, everyone knows exactly what they're grunting and pointing about. They no longer feel the need to expend the energy needed for thought and actual speech when a simple grunt will do. (Now I know that people may go off about how to raise a kid so that they don't do this... don't bother. I have not a hatchling, but I do know what not to do. It's just a simple observation and answer to a simple question.)
I think perhaps men do the same thing... as they become comfortable in a relationship, they feel that their partner will know exactly what each grunt and point is supposed to mean. Ladies, don't be put off by this behaviour... it's one of the ultimate compliments. And while you may think that it makes a man sound unintelligent, remember; in these energy conscious times, we are conserving energy. Okay, I realize that it's a little lame... if there ever were to be a machine powered by talking, it most likely wouldn't be fueled by men.
I'll post links as they come about.
October 27, 2005
Inspired By Depression... Not So Good
See that post below? I'm thinking that it's one of the worst I've ever written... it looks like a first grader wrote it. But I assure you, I made it most of the way through third grade.
It's a fine example of why I prefer to blog while drinking... when sober, I overthink things, and tend to ramble. I also veered away from topic, but here's why... it's a topic that depresses me. The more I thought of this subject, and I know there are instances when good arguements could be made for either parent, the more depressed I got. That post is the result.
See... I really would be torn apart if anything ever put me in a situation like that. I'd like to think that I'm a responsible person, and wouldn't end up with a T1K before I was ready. It's hard to imagine otherwise.
As for the post, I'd like to delete it in some ways... but then again, it's me, or a part of me. And the Tard side of the Force is strong in me.
Men's Club.. Parental Rights
Today, the Men's Club and Divas address a serious subject. I was asked again by everyone's favorite fish to add my take. Hmmm... it's one that I have no familiarity with, but I do have some thoughts about it. If you don't agree, that's cool... write your own response, and trackback to me, or send me the link... I'll link to ya. Just keep things civil here... it's supposed to be a comfortable atmosphere. You start raising too much hell, and I'll have to crack a beer stien over your skull. Of course, that would be done in a very friendly manner....
Today's discussion is about parental rights. More specifically, whether the biological father of an unborn child should have the right to block a woman's abortion. And, should she have an abortion and not inform the the father, should she be subject to damages for her failure to disclose prior to termination of the pregnancy? Yes, serious topics, indeed. Not really my style of posting, but then again, I was asked, I'll post.
Should a biological father have the right to block a woman's abortion? While I would like to say "yes," I know the answer is "no." As far as I know, he has no legal right to make a call regarding her body. Now, I've got to write about this as it would apply to me. I would like to think that I would never be put in this situation. Gott knows, I would love to hatch little drunkards one day and I'd like to think that the woman who would choose to hang with me would feel the same. Should something happen where she would try to abort, I would like to be consulted, at the least. It's not something that I would want to happen... I'd hope that if we had been far enough into the relationship to spawn, we would have better communication. We're both supposed to be big kids now.
Now should she choose to dispose of a future That 1 Kid, and not inform me of her decision... well, all I know for sure is that I'd be crushed. I don't know that I would try to seek damages, even if one could. I do know that there are some spiteful decisions that have been made... I could understand someone trying to seek some sort of justice for a decision made out of spite. But I don't know that it would do anyone any good. It's a painful scenario... a painful thought.
Again, I would hope that I would never have to deal with these decisions... I don't know how well I'd do.
Crap... rereading this, I realize that I haven't really said much. It looks as if I sidestepped the issue. Maybe I did, though unintentional.
For more educated views, check out the rest: The Ladies, Kathy, at Cake Eater Chronicles, Silk, at Just Breathe, Phoenix, at Villians Vanquished, and guest Diva, Ruth, of Chaos Theory.
The Gents: The Maximum Leader, at Naked Villainy, Jamesy, at The Future's Bright, Stigmata, at Project Bowl, and, of course, Phin, at Phin's Blog.
There may be some others... I'll link as I get them.