Boxed Ear

Sissy and Bou have been playing a bit of bug poker. Sissy's latest tale was declared the winnah over Bou's Sleeping With The Roaches. I don't claim to have a better tale, or even think that it's in their class, but it reminded me of my own story. Not being a roach story, it's kinda lame.

In the Midwest (and probably elsewhere), each fall sees an invasion of our homes. Especially in the rural areas. No matter what you do, you will always find a guest or two inside your house. Along the south facing walls, they gather in the hundreds, and around my house, the thousands.

I had worked a long shift this night, and I slept the sleep of the dead when I finally got home and showered up. After about an hour, I was awakened by a loud rustling. I sat up, turned on the lights, and looked around. Nothing. So I lay back down.

Just as I was drifting back to sleep, I heard it again. Again, I found nothing. So I waited.

Sure enough, after I had settled down again, I heard it again. This time it positively roared. It sounded like it was in my head, and I soon figured out, it was.

I got dressed to go to the ER, and as I was moving around, it happened again. As soon as I heard the rustling, I lost my balance... the damn thing was against my eardrum. I shit you not.

The drive to the ER was interesting to say the least, but at least the hospital was just over a mile away. There, they tried to remove the bug by using some kind of oil. It didn't work... it started pushing up against my eardrum, driving me nuts! Meanwhile, they tried a couple different methods to get it out, but none worked. Finally, the damn thing died, and they used a small vaccuum to extract it.

What was it? Why, it was a box elder bug. Okay... that's a shot that makes them look huge. This shot give a better idea of their size. From what I understand, it was a freak incident... they don't usually crawl into ears.

Perhaps I should have bought a lottery ticket.

Posted by That 1 Guy at September 25, 2006 07:22 PM | TrackBack