Rain, Roofs, and Bre'fus

One of the things I've been asking the landlord about, since I moved in five years ago, was installing a rain gutter over my door. The roof slants that way, and in a downpour, you're walking through a sheet of water. Even in a light rain, the water has a way of finding it's way down your neck... and in a November rain, that sucks. I won't even begin to describe fumbling drunkenly with your keys on a rainy November night...

Anyway, I took my car to the garage today to have some work done, and, since it's only three blocks away, I refused the offerred ride home. I stopped by the gas station and picked up a healthy breakfast of taquitos, and made my way home. Glancing at the sky, I knew I better hurry. It's been raining off and on this morning.

I managed to avoid most of the rain... it was a light sprinkle by the time I hit the back door. But I had locked the door out of habit, so I was stuck trying to locate my house key. Hah... I got my key and unlocked the door, just in time to feel a stream of water hit my hand. Actually, it hit my hand after running over my taquito.

I was a little pissed... I mean, it's been five years of asking, sure, I guess that's good enough reason to be upset. But my taquito getting soaked... with water that's been running over a surface where birds shit, and nasty ass squirrels frolic, not to mention the gallons of bee killer I've used. That's enough to ruin a day. Then I started thinking about how many times I had brushed sand and dirt off of grub as a Marine. Hey, food is food until you don't eat it. That's when it becomes trash.

So I cowboyed up, forced the visions of piles of starling dropping's and diseased squirrels from my mind, and finished off the ruined taquito. I couldn't taste anything out of the ordinary, but just to be sure, I rinsed my mouth out with a mouthful of bourbon, and chased it with a coke. Hoping to insure total safety, I repeated the process.

Wow... now that's a breakfast! I can't go job hunting today, but it wasn't a bad way to get rolling.

Posted by That 1 Guy at November 28, 2005 11:45 AM