January 05, 2008


Well, I went and got the car smogged yesterday. I knew it would be something simple, but I wasn't sure what they'd do.

I was kinda thinking that maybe they'd hook a hose up to your exhaust, shove it into your window, and make you sit there for ten minutes. If you lived, your car was clean. If you had to pop open a door, you failed, and would have to repeat the test until you either died, or were deemed emissions friendly. (What exactly are emissions, anyway? Seems to me that they've been around longer than the internet... whoever figured out that there would be a web, and that it would need missionaries, was really on top of their game.)

Anyway, turns out that there was to be none of that fun stuff. Instead, they shove some kind of sensor up the car's ass. The car, quite obviously, doesn't care so much for this, and winds out the rpms. (Actually, it is parked on a dyno, but still, the car doesn't sound happy.) My car passed with flying CO2lors.

The cost of the state's certificate is $8.25... and you get nothing for it! No certificate, suitable for framing. No stickers, anymore. Your info is entered into the computer, and there you go...

Oh... BTW. That low cost? That's on top of the $30-$80 dollars that you are charged for the actual test on the dyno. Ten minutes, tops, for me. My bill was $58.25... and that is actually pretty much the average. (Not too bad, but still... I'd have loved to have gotten a hook up like Barmy Mama did.)

What a great way to rack up the ching!

Posted by That 1 Guy at January 5, 2008 01:32 PM | TrackBack

Sooo, are you even allowed to have grass? You know, with lawn mowers not having mufflers and catalytic converters?

Posted by: upset waitress at January 5, 2008 05:38 PM

Being California, grass is in abundance. Though, if you have it, you probably don't want to mow it...

Posted by: That 1 Guy at January 5, 2008 05:47 PM




I don't know what worries me more...that your mind goes this way or that I followed without a blink of the eye.....

come to think of it, maybe YOU should be worried!!!

Posted by: Tammi at January 5, 2008 06:22 PM

Try growing some boobs and batting your eyelashes while wearing a blank gullible expression.
I don't know if I should be ashamed for using this tactic for my own advantage or superior for pulling off the oldest trick in the book.
Incidentally, the command had me use that one on supply whenever we needed things for the office. I swear the guys down there probably thought I was the ditsiest corporal at Camp Pendleton. *sigh*

Posted by: Barmy Mama at January 5, 2008 07:37 PM

When does this blog turn pink? Isn't that coming soon?

Posted by: Bou at January 5, 2008 09:45 PM

What's the carbon footprint of the facility which is testing CO2 emissions????

Posted by: awdt_bx19 at January 6, 2008 05:39 AM

Yeah a lawnmower gives off more emissions than 20 cars..supposedly.

I've had plenty of cars that blew white smoke. Good thing the inspectors take bribes.

Posted by: hammer at January 6, 2008 09:09 AM

"I've had plenty of cars that blew white smoke."

I've had plenty of California girls that blew white owls.

The smog laws and costs are a small price to pay in the long run...

Posted by: Mark at January 7, 2008 08:05 AM

One of the biggest scams in California. Smog checking your car. I think they'd make more headway cleaning up the air if they made all these tree huggers take a shower once a week.

Posted by: Navy CPO at January 7, 2008 10:36 AM

So, they didn't make you do that in Illinois? We had to have it done every other year or something like that. Maybe it was just the Chicagoland area.

A royal PITA ... but we did get a sticker out of the deal. (if I had been a small child, this might have been exciting - as it was... there was just another piece of paper stuck on my windshield, hopefully not impeding the view - heh)

Posted by: Teresa at January 7, 2008 01:14 PM