For Some Peeps

Got to thinking the other night, and I realized that I don't always cater to all of my readers. It ain't fair. So I figured that I should try to hook them up.

Here's to some prime mates of mine. Some cheesecake...

You may be asking, "WTF???" Well, here's the scoop: Monkeys are people, too. A little bit of cheesecake every now and again is greatly appreciated.

Hey, it's true. I was reading earlier today about how drunken monkeys mirror people. Duh... I could have told you that. Who the hell do you think writes half of my drunken posts? Between me and my crew of rhesus, we come up with the drivel that I force upon you.

Well, I checked into it a bit, and I found another bit of info, though it's not exactly the latest news. Monkeys pay for sexy photos, too. That link requires registration, so I'll quote the whole thing:

A recent study has found that male macaques will readily give up food in order to look at photos of a female monkey's bottom. Males gave up portions of juice in exchange for a half-second glimpse of a female macaque's genitals and anus. "Virtually all monkeys will give up juice to see female hindquarters," says the leader of the study, Robert Deaner. "They really value the images." The males would also give up juice in order to look at faces of the males in their troop, presumably in order to gather social information about their companions and rivals. But they would only give up very small portions of juice compared to what they were willing to sacrifice for a half-second glimpse of a female's behind.

That explains the credit card billings from "Monkey Ass Mommas." I'm gonna have to get myself a new crew... one that doesn't drink so much, or spend all of their time spanking each other.

Posted by That 1 Guy at May 10, 2006 12:20 AM